Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

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Sex outside a relationship:

yasss give me that multiple D
11
19%
no i need a loyal man <3
46
81%
 
Total votes : 57

Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Vortex » 25th July, 2016, 5:35 am

Sex is, to me, meaningless. So monogamy isn't an issue for me; I can entirely separate sex and intimacy.

What is important for me sexually is emotional intimacy, not physical.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Cobalt » 25th July, 2016, 5:37 am

Vortex wrote:Sex is, to me, meaningless.

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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Vortex » 25th July, 2016, 5:38 am

Yes.
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Ebsy wrote:Leave it to losers on Twitter to complain about being pandered to. You're supposed to complain when someone panders to others, not to you.
[4:46 AM] Saint Drogo: Also, you've got a strangely appealing asshole. I'll give you that much.
[6:03 AM] Pity: Omg... stop making me sound like a racist idiot
[4:51 AM] Scherzy: jerk off to clinton in the safety of your own bedroom luv
[2:56 PM] Saint Drogo: Literally let me use my cock as a paintbrush and my unborn children as paint.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Angelic Haze » 25th July, 2016, 5:44 am

I wouldn't be able to deal with not having loyalty. I can't deny it either but I think a big part of it is because I know for a fact that I'd get jealous. If I was with somebody and they wanted an open relationship the first thing I'd think of is that I can't satisfy what they need which isn't a nice idea and I wouldn't want to sleep with somebody else and possibly make my partner feel like this either. So for me it'd have to be loyalty or nothing. If I slept with somebody else whilst in a relationship it'd tear me apart everytime I thought about it because it's just something which I can't see as right. Relationships come with commitment and I'd be breaking that by sleeping with anyone else.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Tim. » 25th July, 2016, 9:06 am

I'm honestly quite neutral to the idea. Any decision on whether or not I'd be open to an open relationship of any sort would probably depend mostly on the dynamic of whatever relationship I'm in. Like Vortex, sex is meaningless to me, so a relationship would be mostly emotional intimacy over physical intimacy. A partner being physically intimate with someone else probably wouldn't bother me, provided they didn't go behind my back. yet emotionally I would want their full attention.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Russell » 25th July, 2016, 1:36 pm

Hmm, this is a tricky one to answer. I could live with my partner sleeping with other people, as long as it was a purely physical thing and only on the condition that they were completely honest and upfront about it. Whilst it would irritate me slightly, that irritation would only stem from my own frustration at being unable to provide whatever it is they are getting through being with another. Which is funny because under no circumstance do I think I could bring myself to sleep with someone else whilst in a committed relationship, even if I had permission.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Bhunivelze » 3rd August, 2016, 1:08 pm

Everyone thinks a polyamorous relationship is a good idea until they're actually in a polyamorous relationship.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby DrakoVongola1 » 12th August, 2016, 2:22 am

Bhunivelze wrote:Everyone thinks a polyamorous relationship is a good idea until they're actually in a polyamorous relationship.

I'm sure it works for some people, but I think there's a reason most modern humans are monogamous
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Mawd » 12th August, 2016, 2:30 am

DrakoVongola1 wrote:
Bhunivelze wrote:Everyone thinks a polyamorous relationship is a good idea until they're actually in a polyamorous relationship.

I'm sure it works for some people, but I think there's a reason most modern humans are monogamous


Yeah we usually call that reason culture, but religion is also a fine answer.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby hero » 12th August, 2016, 3:47 am

fuck polyamorous propaganda garbage
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby DrakoVongola1 » 12th August, 2016, 4:15 am

Mawd wrote:
DrakoVongola1 wrote:
Bhunivelze wrote:Everyone thinks a polyamorous relationship is a good idea until they're actually in a polyamorous relationship.

I'm sure it works for some people, but I think there's a reason most modern humans are monogamous


Yeah we usually call that reason culture, but religion is also a fine answer.

Yeah that's part of it, but I think most people just work better in that type of relationship
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby George » 12th August, 2016, 4:50 pm

Changing my answer to a no.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Volvic » 12th August, 2016, 4:57 pm

No. I don't really understand it. If you're in an open relationship, I'm not sure what the difference between being boyfriends and best friends is. IMO love is about sacrificing free sex with anyone hot for a longterm monogamous relationship.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Mawd » 12th August, 2016, 5:14 pm

I'm not sure how tangible the difference is when you're young.
To my mind the relationship ive had with any best friend has been on a completely different tier to my relationship with Ben after knowing, loving, and living with him for almost five years. It's just a whole different planet to anything a platonic or post-sexual relationship could be.

My thought process on how I'd see anyone else we'd be with is that sure, we'd have been intimate together, we'd shared parts of ourselves we don't give freely to everyone; but they'd never eclipse my shining star. Id be fond of them for the time we spend but it'd never come close.

I think a lot of people see or hear this kind of relationship in a very insincere or immature sphere which doesnt really leave room.for a positive experience when everyone is so young.

I do know at least one actively open, married couple and they're in about their mid 30's. They've been pretty much heterosexual for most of their lives and now that they're more sure of themselves and away from some family they're branching out (at least that's the gist of it).
Anyway the wife has been dating other women and.i think the husband has been more passive in his own search. I don't know the full details but i can tell you it works for them at least.
It just takes a lot of maturity, sharing, and communication.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Volvic » 12th August, 2016, 5:24 pm

So what would you say would be the observable difference between you and your boyfriend's relationship and you and your one nighter's relationships? Just to give me an understanding. Is it that you hang out with Ben more? Or that you do all the lovey stuff like buy gifts etc?
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Mawd » 12th August, 2016, 5:52 pm

Im probably not going to (fullly) sell you on this because its complex, i havent nailed everything down, and im writing because i cant friggen sleep.

Well for starters living together for years and being lovers means you see a lot more of a person than otherwise. I'd say that we dont have to get each other things or behave like a newer relationship would. We've obviously been through more conflict and positive experiences with each other; we know each other's patterns so well that we fit like a tailor made glove.
New couples, any new relationship has a lot of rough edges, they're feeding off (presumably powerful) recent experiences, but older couplets have a groove, they've (hopefully) still got that power to them but its part of a cycle that (should be) familiar and made of ebbs and flows.

I guess the main thing is that we know each other more, like a shitload more; long term platonic flatmates would end up with the same kind of thing just without all the extra mess that romance and sex brings.

The one nighter? They're fun, a bit of short term passion. Presumably someone we gel with and knows us well enough but isnt.a.serious thing and understands that as well as we do.

I can probably say more if i come back to this but a lack of sleep is really getting to me here.

Can probably give an example of how we'd approach it too.

P.s phone is about to die
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Volvic » 12th August, 2016, 6:04 pm

Come back if you're able to when you're less sleepy. Yeah I assuned as much with the comoarison to the long term flatmates. When you say "we" do you mean the polygamy is you and your bf with another guy TOGETHER or that you both do it separately? I'd assume there is a big difference in how that works. A lot more trust required to do it separately.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby hero » 13th August, 2016, 3:13 am

also @ the title of this thread .....
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Sokol » 16th September, 2017, 4:04 pm

Open relationships in general aren't my cup of tea. I don't mind other people being in an open relationship but I wouldn't be able to handle the thought of my parner sleeping with someone else.
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Re: Would you sex with someone else if you were in a relationship?

Unread postby Vortex » 11th October, 2017, 5:27 pm

George wrote:Changing my answer to a no.

Well this aged well.
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Ebsy wrote:Leave it to losers on Twitter to complain about being pandered to. You're supposed to complain when someone panders to others, not to you.
[4:46 AM] Saint Drogo: Also, you've got a strangely appealing asshole. I'll give you that much.
[6:03 AM] Pity: Omg... stop making me sound like a racist idiot
[4:51 AM] Scherzy: jerk off to clinton in the safety of your own bedroom luv
[2:56 PM] Saint Drogo: Literally let me use my cock as a paintbrush and my unborn children as paint.
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