High School-College separation. Help!

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High School-College separation. Help!

Unread postby Zackie » 10th August, 2017, 11:49 pm

I'm going into my senior year of High School. My boyfriend is going into his Junior year. Which means (obviously) that I'll graduate ahead of him, and speed off to college first. More or less leaving him in the dust, and I'm afraid.

While the college I plan to attend is only two hours away, I don't have the luxury of being able to silently text him. He doesn't have a cell phone. I need to call his home, which complicates things for a lot of reasons, chief among them being: I get involved in a lot. I can't reasonably be expected to drop what I'm doing to commit to a phone-call (I'll never build up a good rep), nor can I put it off to later to chat with him into the wee hours of the morning (that's just irresponsible). So with that restriction in mind, it tightens the reins in terms of limited contact with him after high school, and in my eyes, may put the difficulty curve on a whole other level. Extremely limited time frames for communication, or conversely wild and unpredictable availability, are not ideal.

On top of that, the next year he'll be attending a different college and facing the same struggles I am, only now I would have NO way of contacting him other than possibly E-mail, or text if he decides he'll buy himself a phone in college, and frankly the whole concept of being absolutely disconnected from my boyfriend for months on end is disquieting and scary. What's your advice?
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Re: High School-College separation. Help!

Unread postby Pity » 11th August, 2017, 1:27 am

You are probably not going to like this, but I think you two should both think long term. Unless you both are fine being almost entirely disconnected for a year and then totally walled off the next if he goes to a different college, it may be beneficial to mutually end the relationship on good terms. You two could try how a long-distance relationship works for the relationship for a few months and see if it is best to continue that way. A relationship where the only forms of communication are carefully-planned phone call and occasional, sporadic visits seems unfair to both parties, at least in my eyes. I am not trying discourage you, though; if you two speak about and figure out how to make it work. I hope I was of some help. Good luck! :heart:
Last edited by Pity on 15th August, 2017, 3:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: High School-College separation. Help!

Unread postby Unseasoned Chicken » 11th August, 2017, 3:28 am

Pretty much what Pity said, but I really find it hard to believe there's no way he can get a cellphone?? You can literally get $20 ones these days unless you're dating an Amish guy.
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Re: High School-College separation. Help!

Unread postby Zackie » 11th August, 2017, 4:13 pm

Ethán wrote:Pretty much what Pity said, but I really find it hard to believe there's no way he can get a cellphone?? You can literally get $20 ones these days unless you're dating an Amish guy.


His parents won't let him get a job, They will not consider buying him one, and he doesn't want to bother getting one because he's embarrassed at how little he knows about using them. I'm afraid that last point is going to carry through and prohibit communication.
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Suicide via Cyanide

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Re: High School-College separation. Help!

Unread postby c70 » 12th August, 2017, 4:29 pm

You still have a year in high school with him, so I would make the best of it. I agree with Pity that you should focus on the long-term side of things. But, not just yet. I would wait until you are closer to the end of the year and then address possible communication options and issues with him, and figure out how to best handle the relationship from there.
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