Where do I draw the line

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Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Anonymous1427 » 4th October, 2017, 12:38 am

Ok well I couldn’t find a rant sub forum so I’m putting it here
So my dad is pretty controlling. Not abusive in anyway but just controlling. So first of all I can’t be gay in his house but beyond that, he is controlling about my schooling too. I’m trying to decide which direction to go in college but I’m not allowed to do a four year degree unless I get really involved with my church (because priorities). Also he wants me to go do college for something specific, but I don’t really like what he wants me to go to college for but when I try to talk about it with him he pushes it off. Another way he’s controlling is him and my brother play football (not a competitive league, just a friendly group of people who play every week) and it’s like another religion to him. He expects me to play but I hate it. It’s emberassing for me because I am so bad.
My dad works super hard so that I can have a good life and I really want to do my best in everything and make him proud but I just don’t know where to draw the line between my happiness vs making him happy
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Re: Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Lochlan » 4th October, 2017, 12:12 pm

You seem to have been doing as much as you can to make him happy, but at the end of the day, it's your life. You don't have to go to church or do football if you don't want to, and you should be able to do whatever course you want to do, as long as it is achievable. You'll probably have to let him know this is an adult conversation and just let him know there's no changing your mind, it's your life and you should have the final say. Hope it all works out for you :) x
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Re: Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Tim. » 4th October, 2017, 12:59 pm

This is why it shouldn't be the parents responsibity to pay for college. Silly USA.

Seriously though, you should try to have a conversation with your dad about what you want out of college and what your thoughts, plans and desires are around it. I would keep homosexuality out of the discussion though, as it seems he is not exactly accepting so not drawing his attention to it is maybe a good idea in this situation.
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Re: Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Anonymous1427 » 4th October, 2017, 6:54 pm

Tim. wrote:This is why it shouldn't be the parents responsibity to pay for college. Silly USA.

Seriously though, you should try to have a conversation with your dad about what you want out of college and what your thoughts, plans and desires are around it. I would keep homosexuality out of the discussion though, as it seems he is not exactly accepting so not drawing his attention to it is maybe a good idea in this situation.


He’s not even paying for it though
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Re: Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Anonymous1427 » 4th October, 2017, 6:55 pm

Lochlan wrote:You seem to have been doing as much as you can to make him happy, but at the end of the day, it's your life. You don't have to go to church or do football if you don't want to, and you should be able to do whatever course you want to do, as long as it is achievable. You'll probably have to let him know this is an adult conversation and just let him know there's no changing your mind, it's your life and you should have the final say. Hope it all works out for you :) x


Thanks but I’m only 16 which means I still have to follow his rules
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Re: Where do I draw the line

Unread postby Woollyhoolly » 5th October, 2017, 11:48 am

Lol no. You’re 16, not 2. You need to have a serious convo with him explaining you are not his slave, and that you have your own free will.
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