Don't feel like i'm good enough

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Don't feel like i'm good enough

Unread postby Matthew124 » 21st January, 2018, 3:16 pm

I'm a guy boy, but like I don't feel I fit in. I'm not friends with any girls or anything like most gay boys. On Tinder I see all these other boys and they have loads of friends and look like they have so much fun. Maybe I'm just overthinking but recently it's got me down. I don't really have that many friends maybe like two close ones- one of whom is gay. It's actually got me really sad and down and I think i'll be like this for some time , it's probably cause I'm quite boring and kinda socially anxious why I don't have a lot of friends. I keep trying to say to myself "I'm me" and I'm unique but any time I do these other thoughts come back. I can't help it, does anyone have some reassuring advice, thanks?
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Re: Don't feel like i'm good enough

Unread postby Sokol » 21st January, 2018, 3:40 pm

How old are you? Because if you're -18, you shouldn't worry too much because you will probably be making friends during your further studies.
If you're older that 18, you should try and talk to more people and try not to be shy about it, I know this sounds easier than you think but downing yourself isn't gonna help. You should see the positives about yourself. :keke:
You can always make friends when you try hard enough, but you should also remember not to be too clingy.
If you want to make friends from here, you could also consider joining our Discord channel clicking the following link: https://discord.gg/NHKDJVa

If you have further questions, you can always ask them. :keke:
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Re: Don't feel like i'm good enough

Unread postby wolbre04 » 21st January, 2018, 7:34 pm

Just because you're gay doesn't mean you have to adhere to stereotypes or so called "norms" of the culture such as being outgoing, flirtatious, and having tons of female friends. Also, having quality friends is far more important than having a sheer number of them, you want people who can provide support for you and you for them, people who won't leave you hanging and will stick their necks out for you.
It's ok to be socially anxious, it's an unrealistic expectation of yourself to be Mr. Cool and be ultra macho and confidant every time. Just be yourself and find others who will respect you and uphold your dignity :)
The server here has tons of people that are welcoming and warm, so feel free to come in anytime and chat with any number of us. Additionally, if you want to find more friends near you maybe speak with a school staff member who can direct you to a club, activity, or program that interests you :D
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Re: Don't feel like i'm good enough

Unread postby Hohenidoom » 21st January, 2018, 8:04 pm

Ack, being boring and awkward isn't a fantastic combo admittedly, but by darn it isn't a barrier to social connections nor to lasting friendships. You can't just go and try to force on yourself a lifestyle you either don't aspire to or desire purely out of social jealously - it'll all end in more self doubt and upset. Friends will find each other and that will be it's on reward for your patience, if you'll pardon my banal cliché.

Keep on doing whatever you're doing kiddo, it'll fall into place.
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